Friday, July 30, 2010

Reflections on Family

I have had a fun filled two weeks with my nieces and nephews,  but I can honestly say they have worn me out ! LOL I try to make their trips to Houston full of activities and to be honest sometimes I may overdo it, but I just feel like I am missing out on so much of their development since we don't live close, so I really concentrate on "making memories" and they seem to enjoy it. This is the same crew that comes for Spring Break each year. I only have one sister (my biological father does have other kids but I didn't grow up with them and don't know them very well). We grew up close with our cousins, because our mothers were extremely close. My sister has 3 kids and two of my cousins send their daughters too, so I end up having six kids ranging in ages of 3 to 16. Now I can say the oldest one, my cousins daughter is a great help, without her assistance with washing and combing heads,  fixing plates, I don't know if I could make it some days. My sister's oldest Savannah who is almost 10 is also a huge help especially with her 3yr old brother, plus she is a bit of a busy body, and wants to be involved in everything, which sometimes works in my favor when I need her ! LOL

My family arrived the day after my birthday to bring the kids to Houston, and  all the parents stayed over the weekend before heading back home. It was so funny, my cousins 5 yr old Alexandra, must have thought her parents were just going to drop her off and keep it moving cause we were having breakfast on Saturday and she looked at her dad and said "so when are y'all leaving ?"  LMAO we cracked up, and her dad said, "why do you ask ?" and she said, " I was just wondering cause I'm on vacation !" LOL We were dying laughing ! 

For the most part, I let them get away with a lot, staying up late, sleeping in, snacking just being kids, but they are at the age where all of their personalities are becoming so developed and there are some conflicts that arise, some arguing, etc. which I know is just natural kids stuff. It's funny to listen to them when they think no one is paying attention. Listening to how they resolve conflict, how they brag, even tell tall tales trying to impress one another, and even how they try to manipulate me like I don't see them coming a mile away ! LOL

It rained quite a bit over these past weeks, so a lot of the outdoor activities I planned got rained out, like Kemah Boardwalk (ooh their feelings were hurt !), but we did get to go the Aquarium Downtown and Itz for Olivia's 8th Birthday as well as roller skating and painting and a couple of movies. We had to move it indoors for the most part but still managed to have some fun. 

Now I know I have said this before, but it bears repeating. Every time these children come here, turn my life upside down and then leave me to myself, I have a renewed respect for the daily time, attention, work,  and commitment to nurturing that full time mother's put in day after day. I mean mad respect. As a single person who lives alone with only me to be responsible for on a daily basis, I can easily see what an full-time... or I should say overtime job motherhood is in a very real way. Not to mention the emotional aspect of being a constant encourager, answering the craziest questions, having to discipline, etc. Then, getting those kids dressed for church on Sunday after cooking breakfast and combing hair was enough to have me spent and as soon as service was over, it was time to feed them yet again. ! Ooh wee.

One of the things that definitely adds to my work load is the swimming. I am definitely a water baby. Me and my sister both have been swimming since were were 7 & 8. I love the fact that these kids love the water and are not afraid of it at all just like us. The younger ones see that the older ones can swim and want to keep up with them so they are doing their best to learn too. The only thing is all these kids have lots of hair, and you have to take great care to insure that the chlorine gets out.  So some days when I just did not have it in me to do the full on  hair production yet again, I had to say no, but most days I would just suck it up, because I can vividly remember and still know of the joy that swimming brings ! We have a community pool in my Subdivision a few blocks away, but last summer, the crew managed to charm my neighbor across the street who has a huge two story house with a pool and jacuzzi in the back. She invited them last year to come over any time and again this year when she saw they had arrived, gave us the same open invitation, which we accepted several times these past two weeks.  Since we are traveling tomorrow, while we were out today, I let them  get her a gift card and a thank you card. They were so excited to get back home, write their own personal messages in the card and run it over to her house ! LOL

So tomorrow is the final day. I have been washing and packing all evening, getting the snacks for the road trip ready, and preparing myself for the long ride. Although, I will have help with that. Mr. Mixologist will be driving us back tomorrow. He has been a big help as well, even took them to Imaginations to paint while I went to the Salon to get my hair done and a pedicure ! Huge points. He grilled for us last week and also treated us to a movie and these kids are working their way into his heart ! LOL.  When he wasn't around they were asking about him.... his status.... his ETA ! LOL .  Mr. Mixologist  did make my birthday special, he cooked dinner for me, gave a beautiful card, and did not disappoint when he presented me with great seats to this Concert. When my family got here two weeks ago, we had a little belated happy hour for my birthday here at the house, and he worked really hard, serving up his famous libations to which they were much appreciative. So all in all my birthday was great ! 

**ahem**

Yes, Mr. Mixologist is going home to meet the family :) I am a little excited, yet nervous. Don't really know why, but feel silly that it matters so much. Hope it goes well.... I know that it's going to be OK,  but I am still anxious. I guess since it has been along time since any body mattered this much, I just want it to go well... on both ends. I don't want to put too much pressure on the situation but truthfully, when you live far away, usually you only bring  significant people around your folks. Maybe in some small way, I am worried that taking this step too soon might jinx it & then as soon as I say it, that sounds silly LOL, but I am being honest. My parents & aunts,uncle and other cousins are anxious to meet him and I guess just curious, and very excited that things are working well for us, so they want to get a look at him! LOL My cousins gave good reports from two weeks ago. Best believe I heard about that. So anyway wish me luck. I am sure that I am anxious for nothing.


How has your summer been ?

Created any special memories ?

Comments or Observations ?


Beautifully Complex


Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Birthday Edition - Just Me.......... Randomly

Happy Birthday to me....... Happy Birthday to me !

So thankful to be blessed to see another year and this one went by very fast. I am seriously understanding the meaning of enjoying life every. single. day. because this time is not waiting... at all. LOL



I am appreciating simple things more and more it seems. I don't know if its age, maturity, wisdom or a combination of all three but I am enjoying the fullness of my life and every experience that each day brings.



I am learning the art of saying no...without the guilt. I am a reformed "people pleaser" and I used to allow it to stress me out. I say "used to" like it has changed totally LOL ! The truth is, it is still hard for me occasionally, but I am definitely getting better. I used to want to commit to everything and everybody, but I am learning to accept that I can't do everything. Conflicts arise some out of your control. I recently missed my line sisters baby shower which would have required traveling quite a distance. I really did want to see her and everyone there. I just couldn't make it happen and I am OK with it. On to the next one.



Just got back from NOLA last week. I attended my 12th Essence Festival ! I have to admit it took me about 3 days to recover no joke. Now on the way home I can honestly say I was really beginning to feel my age for the first time. I used to bounce back much faster. Either way I can't imagine going anywhere else for the 4th of July it just wouldn't seem right. I appreciate the way that Essence tweaks things a bit every year so that it's what you expect, yet still different. Now for the record, I definitely missed Frankie Beverly and Maze and cry foul on the decision to remove them from the lineup this year. Not that Earth Wind & Fire isn't a good band, because they most definitely are, but I just feel like Frankie & Maze are just staples of the Essence experience & they should not have messed with that tradition. But they didn't consult with me. LOL



Saw my favorites of course, Lalah Hathaway, Ledisi, Mint Condition, Joe to name a few. I looooooove the Superlounges so much better than the main stage. It seems the Artists that I like the best are always there. I love the intimate setting & the fact that I can make eye contact with the Artists & get right up close to the stage. I follow Lalah & Ledisi on twitter so that was pretty cool to keep up with them while being in such close proximity.



On the relationship front.....things are going wonderfully ! We have made it to the six month mark just this week and we BOTH are pretty proud of that fact and still excited about it. I am still smiling everyday and feeling blessed to have found someone that accepts me as I am. Also, I think I am going to give my honey (formerly known as Eastcoast) a new blog name, Mr. Mixologist for a couple of reasons. First and foremost because of his talents with creative libations. He prepared some Lemon Drop Martini's for me and my girls to take with us to NOLA and baby, we were feeling it as soon as we got settled in our rooms and broke into that cooler ! He also makes a mean Cosmo and a Mojito that will make you think you are down in Cuba ! Secondly, because he is a hilarious jokester, that keeps me on my toes daily. He is always teasing me and makes me laugh at myself all the time. We have all these inside jokes now, where he or I can say one word, that reminds us of something that we were laughing at last week and we are dying laughing again ! I really like that about him.



This year my birthday is pretty low key since I had the big 3 day Extravaganza last year. However, I do have some family coming in this weekend that will be meeting Mr. Mixologist for the first time. I am both excited and nervous about that. There is one person in particular that I really want him to click with, but I want it to happen naturally. Mr. Mixologist plans to take him to his Cigar spot & just might get him some extra points.



My nieces and nephew will be here soon, to wear me out for a couple of weeks before they head back to school. I am sure to have some blog fodder during their visit, so hopefully I can get into a habit of posting more timely.



Lately, I have been doing more listening and asking more questions and being quiet so I can hear HIM. I am definitely being more reflective these days and being open to receive what is for me. I am learning to accept some things in a real way. This has led me to experience a level of contentment that I haven't felt in a while. It feels good.



Be Blessed !


Beautifully Complex