I must confess, sometimes the internet is my pacifier. It's amazing how many mind numbing hours I can spend and not realize how much time has actually passed. So many people talk about how the internet has caused us to become disconnected and I can concede that point to a degree but in many ways, the internet has allowed me to be connected to so many more people in more intimate ways than I could ever have imagined.
Honestly, there are many times when I use the internet to help me deal with boredom, loneliness, frustration, and especially insomnia. I don't know if I can say it really helps me or not, but it definitely serves as a serious distraction and makes it more palatable some days.
Today I am going to share some of the more interesting sites I have run across either just doing random searches or found on some of my favorite blogs. I have these bookmarked to occasionally peruse depending on my mood. These provide me hours upon hours of mindless entertainment, laughs, amazement, shock and awe. Sometimes I even learn something ! LOL Hope you enjoy.
MY UNTOLD SECRETS
This is an anonymous site where people can post things that they may have not have ever confessed to anyone. These can be thoughts or opinions about situations or actual confessions of things that people have actually done. It can range from, " I have the password to my ex-girlfriends email and still check it since we broke up 3 years ago just so I can keep up with what's going on in her life " to something like " I took someone's life by striking them with a car and leaving the scene. I'm such a coward, its been 15 years & it still haunts me. Lord help me. " After reading numerous posts, I realize that some of them are probably not true, but honestly after reading many more, I am inclined to think that the majority are true. The human condition is very fascinating. It's kind of interesting the things that people need to express even if anonymously, I guess as some kind of catharsis. I can actually see myself getting some blog fodder from some of the stuff I have read on there. The pictures and images that the site owner adds to the confessions makes this site a little more compelling as well.
EBONY MAGAZINE ONLINE FROM THE BEGINNING
This is a really cool link. You can read actual original copies of Ebony Magazine from 1959 through 2000. I mean they have every page from cover to cover including all of the advertisements scanned for every month, and this is some very interesting reading ! I probably didn't actually start reading Ebony until I was about 10 years old, so since I have access from ten years prior to my birth, there is at least 20 years of stuff for me to catch up on. There is lots of stuff I had even forgotten I knew in the many pages of this historical magazine. I might actually print some of this stuff off to teach my nieces about African-American culture and history, when they come to visit on their school breaks. You know how they always do the profiles on professional careers in the front of the magazine ? (I can still remember when I was a kid, wanting to grow up and be successful enough to be featured in the magazine just like every other little black child I am sure.) One of the things that I do now is when reading one of these old profiles if somebody interests me, I Goo.gle them now to see whatever happened to them.
YOU KNOW YOU DEAD AZZ WRONG
This is a guilty pleasure of mine, but I have to admit to it ! LOL I am a serious lurker on this site at least weekly, but I NEVER comment. That's really only because there is a group of people who comment on the regular & they have it on lock. They are hilarious & sometimes what they have to say can sometimes be more entertaining than the photos ! People need to understand that the internet is forever and be careful about who you release your images to. The site owner is off the chain too. She posts actual emails from people who write in threatening "legal action" to have their photos taken down from the site, and she clowns them on the regular and REFUSES to take the pics down. Evidently it's usually their "friends" that send the pics in ! LOL It is amazing how proud & unashamed so many people can be, posing like they are doing it when they are looking crazy as H@$% ! LOL I mean sometimes all I can do is SMH and say "my people, my people". After about 30 minutes or so of this site I find myself wondering if the internet really is the devil ?
There you have it folks, some of my favorite time fillers. As you can see they run the gamut from "sick and twisted" to "culturally enlightening" to "hilariously shameful". Please don't judge me ! LOL Hope you enjoy them as much as I do. Check them out and them come back over here & tell me what you think.
Does the internet help you to escape or relieve stress ? Is it just entertainment ?
Do you have any interesting links or sites that you enjoy or would recommend ?
Thanks in advance !
Beautifully Complex
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
Just Me..........Randomly
Greetings Blog family ! Hope your 2010 is off to a wonderful start. Other than the record breaking cold temperatures in Houston over that last couple of weeks making me have to dust off my winter coat that I usually never use here, it has been great.
Got a chance to check out a new wine spot last week. Max's Wine Dive. The wine was great and the food looked really good, but I had already eaten so I didn't get a chance to sample. My group was standing at the end of the bar, near the entrance to the kitchen, so I could see the constant parade of food headed to the tables. I exercised some major discipline and didn't order anything and also limited my wine intake for the evening. The ambiance and the crowd were cool to so I most definitely will be back.
Happy Founder's Day to my beautiful, intelligent, and talented Sorors of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. I was looking through some pledge pictures of me and my line sisters last night and cannot believe how unbelievably skinny I was in college. I would not want to be that skinny again..... but dropping 15-20 lbs. would be good for this year ! LOL
I have a friend who is from Haiti who I actually met online several years ago. Please pray for his family during this challenging time. I spoke with him by phone yesterday and he seems OK but I could not imagine how to deal with so much uncertainty. It seems that financial donations are the best means of helping at the moment.
Tomorrow morning is the Houston Marathon, wish I had stayed committed, like I planned and I wouldn't be talking about dropping lbs :( ! I was looking over my finisher medals from the 4 Half-Marathons that I have completed & had really wanted to be able to run the full by the time I was 40, but my knees have just said no way. I am going to watch it on TV in the morning and then get on the bike for ride. The good thing is that one of my friends has signed me up for another 20 mile bike ride in March and a couple of road races ( 5K & 10K) so I am trying to get prepared & motivated to meet some fitness goals.
Speaking of, so far this year I have been focused on cooking and eating out less. I was doing pretty good the first 10 days or so, but then worked kicked in hard the second week and I have been putting in some very long hours & it's just so convenient to grab something when you are tired. Sometimes meal planning seems like work and I procrastinate & then end up just back to the same. I will try again this weekend to do my shopping and planning & just be better.
I have been getting some of the funniest emails from internet dating sites that I subscribe to.
I think I may save some of them for blog fodder as opposed to deleting them like I usually do.
I haven't really been actively searching but just read the messages that I get a couple times a week. It's funny, since that little age box clicked over to 40 on my profile, all the the 55+ think they have a shot ! LOL
My plans for the lovely weekend include girls night tonight, grocery shopping, meal planning and my date with Denzel Washington on Saturday ! LOL ,then Sunday, watch a bit of the Marathon on TV, put some miles on the bike, head to church, cook dinner & chill. Monday is MLK Day, so weather permitting I will be at the parade. Well, I am headed out to run some errands and get dressed to head to Sullivan's for some fun time with some great friends ?
What's going on random with you ?
Got a chance to check out a new wine spot last week. Max's Wine Dive. The wine was great and the food looked really good, but I had already eaten so I didn't get a chance to sample. My group was standing at the end of the bar, near the entrance to the kitchen, so I could see the constant parade of food headed to the tables. I exercised some major discipline and didn't order anything and also limited my wine intake for the evening. The ambiance and the crowd were cool to so I most definitely will be back.
Happy Founder's Day to my beautiful, intelligent, and talented Sorors of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. I was looking through some pledge pictures of me and my line sisters last night and cannot believe how unbelievably skinny I was in college. I would not want to be that skinny again..... but dropping 15-20 lbs. would be good for this year ! LOL
I have a friend who is from Haiti who I actually met online several years ago. Please pray for his family during this challenging time. I spoke with him by phone yesterday and he seems OK but I could not imagine how to deal with so much uncertainty. It seems that financial donations are the best means of helping at the moment.
Tomorrow morning is the Houston Marathon, wish I had stayed committed, like I planned and I wouldn't be talking about dropping lbs :( ! I was looking over my finisher medals from the 4 Half-Marathons that I have completed & had really wanted to be able to run the full by the time I was 40, but my knees have just said no way. I am going to watch it on TV in the morning and then get on the bike for ride. The good thing is that one of my friends has signed me up for another 20 mile bike ride in March and a couple of road races ( 5K & 10K) so I am trying to get prepared & motivated to meet some fitness goals.
Speaking of, so far this year I have been focused on cooking and eating out less. I was doing pretty good the first 10 days or so, but then worked kicked in hard the second week and I have been putting in some very long hours & it's just so convenient to grab something when you are tired. Sometimes meal planning seems like work and I procrastinate & then end up just back to the same. I will try again this weekend to do my shopping and planning & just be better.
I have been getting some of the funniest emails from internet dating sites that I subscribe to.
I think I may save some of them for blog fodder as opposed to deleting them like I usually do.
I haven't really been actively searching but just read the messages that I get a couple times a week. It's funny, since that little age box clicked over to 40 on my profile, all the the 55+ think they have a shot ! LOL
My plans for the lovely weekend include girls night tonight, grocery shopping, meal planning and my date with Denzel Washington on Saturday ! LOL ,then Sunday, watch a bit of the Marathon on TV, put some miles on the bike, head to church, cook dinner & chill. Monday is MLK Day, so weather permitting I will be at the parade. Well, I am headed out to run some errands and get dressed to head to Sullivan's for some fun time with some great friends ?
What's going on random with you ?
Friday, January 1, 2010
2010 Here We Go !
"Twenty Ten", wow, that sounds really strange to say. A true reminder of just how much time has passed. With all the reflective blogging floating around, it's obvious that the last 10 years have been challenging for many, many people. Since I was born in 1969, each new decade marks a milestone birthday for me, 20, ...30,...40. I have thought about the trials and tribulations of the last 10 years of my life and realize just how unpredictable life can be. I remember back then being so excited to be 30 and finally feeling really grown ! I had just moved away from my family a couple of years prior & me and my ex-husband were getting settled into our independent life in Texas, making great friends, buying a beautiful new home, saving lots of money, being very active in ministry and building on the foundation on which we were raised. Careers were flourishing & I thought I had so much to look forward to, our future was so bright. I was blessed beyond measure. I had no idea that I would soon face infertility, separation due to career moves, emotional turmoil, adultery, divorce, financial ruin, and clinical depression. Many a day I would wake up in utter amazement that my life had unraveled so easily and completely. I remember being so hurt and angry at God, feeling sorry for myself, feeling like I did not deserve all that had happened to me and not sure how to resolve those feelings. Insecurity, shame, and fear ruled my life every day, for a very long time. I can honestly say there were too many days when I hurt so deeply and so completely that I really thought it would be better for me to leave this earth....just to make the pain stop ! I am blessed to have found the strength to make it through. So blessed that He never left me, even if I thought He had. He sent angels in the form of people to touch my life. Dear friends and family that stepped up in the defining moments of my life. It is very hard for me to give my testimony without tears falling, because reflection takes me back and I remember how I felt, it is a painful reminder, but I don't ever, ever want to forget. It keeps me grounded. It keeps me from harsh judgment. It keeps me humble. It is my story.
The transition has been far from easy, in fact it has been the most challenging period of my life, but with Him I have faith and unshakable belief. I tried it without Him because I was angry and felt cheated somehow. What a joke ! LOL Through all the false starts, and failures of my own judgment, He got me right where he needed me to be, submitting to His will, not mine. I can't say there are not days when I sometimes long for what I thought was my life in the past. Sometimes someone says something or asks a question that sets me back, but I know that I cannot move forward while looking backward. My Great-Grandmother used to always say " Get the lesson Baby". It's funny how you hear the things older, wiser people have said to you, over and over again, never really getting it, and then one day, it hits you like an epiphany. I am reluctant to make resolutions this year, I guess primarily because I am finally just resolute period, to spend EACH DAY being the best me that I can be. I want to be a better daughter, better sister, better aunt, better cousin, better friend, better co-worker and just a better Christian period. None of that requires that I lose weight, or save money, or any of the other many resolutions people make and then break every year. This last decade has been a huge learning curve for me and I pledge to use all that I have learned to move into this next decade stronger, wiser, and of course better than I have been.
I spent NYE by myself again this year. Another failed relationship, that barely even got started. I was only slightly disappointed though, which I know is a sign of growth. I trust His will be done. He continues to save me from danger and trouble unseen by me. At the end of the day, I was in church, where I promised myself I would be this year, after last years fiasco. It was a truly blessed experienced. Israel & New Breed performed and Pastor West had a word just for me ! I am counting my blessings this morning and don't have enough fingers and toes to do it. I have no idea what the next 10 years will bring but everywhere I look in my life, I see His hands and that is all the comfort that I need. I don't know if I will ever have children of my own, but I know I have children in my life that love me unconditionally. I am not sure if I will ever be a wife again, but God has protected me and covered me and provided for me better than any man ever could. I don't know if I will ever find the companion that I desire, but I do have friends that cut for me and support me through the struggles and the joys. We share life and enjoy one another and make the most of everything we are blessed with. I have good health and a sound mind. I can smile. I can sleep. I can work. I can pray. I can think and communicate and share myself with the world. I can worship. I have a home. I can travel. I can experience life and all that it offers. I recognize I don't deserve any of this. I can't earn it. I don't take it for granted.
I am excited about the new year, another chance to get it right !
Wishing you Peace & Blessings in 2010 ! Thanks for stopping by !
What are your reflections as we make the big transition ?
The transition has been far from easy, in fact it has been the most challenging period of my life, but with Him I have faith and unshakable belief. I tried it without Him because I was angry and felt cheated somehow. What a joke ! LOL Through all the false starts, and failures of my own judgment, He got me right where he needed me to be, submitting to His will, not mine. I can't say there are not days when I sometimes long for what I thought was my life in the past. Sometimes someone says something or asks a question that sets me back, but I know that I cannot move forward while looking backward. My Great-Grandmother used to always say " Get the lesson Baby". It's funny how you hear the things older, wiser people have said to you, over and over again, never really getting it, and then one day, it hits you like an epiphany. I am reluctant to make resolutions this year, I guess primarily because I am finally just resolute period, to spend EACH DAY being the best me that I can be. I want to be a better daughter, better sister, better aunt, better cousin, better friend, better co-worker and just a better Christian period. None of that requires that I lose weight, or save money, or any of the other many resolutions people make and then break every year. This last decade has been a huge learning curve for me and I pledge to use all that I have learned to move into this next decade stronger, wiser, and of course better than I have been.
I spent NYE by myself again this year. Another failed relationship, that barely even got started. I was only slightly disappointed though, which I know is a sign of growth. I trust His will be done. He continues to save me from danger and trouble unseen by me. At the end of the day, I was in church, where I promised myself I would be this year, after last years fiasco. It was a truly blessed experienced. Israel & New Breed performed and Pastor West had a word just for me ! I am counting my blessings this morning and don't have enough fingers and toes to do it. I have no idea what the next 10 years will bring but everywhere I look in my life, I see His hands and that is all the comfort that I need. I don't know if I will ever have children of my own, but I know I have children in my life that love me unconditionally. I am not sure if I will ever be a wife again, but God has protected me and covered me and provided for me better than any man ever could. I don't know if I will ever find the companion that I desire, but I do have friends that cut for me and support me through the struggles and the joys. We share life and enjoy one another and make the most of everything we are blessed with. I have good health and a sound mind. I can smile. I can sleep. I can work. I can pray. I can think and communicate and share myself with the world. I can worship. I have a home. I can travel. I can experience life and all that it offers. I recognize I don't deserve any of this. I can't earn it. I don't take it for granted.
I am excited about the new year, another chance to get it right !
Wishing you Peace & Blessings in 2010 ! Thanks for stopping by !
What are your reflections as we make the big transition ?
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Underrated yet very Appreciated
If I could be reborn tomorrow as a singer/song writer it would be Lalah Hathaway. There is something about this talented performer that touches me so deeply. I have been a fan since the beginning. I have her first album(which was actually a self titled cassette) to her latest, titled "Self Portrait ". I have met her 3 times and actually got her tape cover signed way back in the day at a show on her promotional tour. I have never been able to get a photo with her which I truly regret. In addition to being talented, she is truly beautiful inside and out to me. A couple of years ago a friend bought me a greatest hits CD of her father Donnie Hathaway, which I had heard growing up as a child, and its amazing how much she sounds like her father in a different kind of way. It is amazing to me that she is not a bigger star than she is since she has more talent in her little finger than many of the mainstream artists out here today. I try my best to support her whenever she comes to town and I have traveled to catch her shows also. Here she performs with another underrated performer, Eric Roberson. I hope you enjoy it.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Your Husband is Cheating on Us
I guess I will go ahead and weigh in on the Tiger Woods situation since its all anyone can talk about at the moment. The most interesting thing to me is the delusional idea that many "jumpoffs", "mistresses" or whatever you want to call them have about the cheaters willingness to "cheat" on them. OK, newsflash, a man cannot cheat "on" you when he is cheating "with" you. That is what you call an oxymoron. I took note of the fact that the first girl that came out of the woodwork did nothing but adamantly deny that she and Tiger were anything but friends, that is UNTIL the other mistresses starting coming out for their 15 minutes of fame. I guess her intention was to be loyal to Tiger and show him that she was down for him and had his back, and would not throw him under the bus, but she soon found out the joke was on her. I guess you are OK with being the sideline chick as long as you are the ONLY sideline ? But once you find out that you are not the only one, then all bets are off ? I mean, you expect faithfulness from a man who is cheating on his wife? WTF I mean where does this arrogance come from ?
I know a guy, who is a friend of a friend, he is married for many years, I am sure his wife knows he cheats, there is no way she could not, in my opinion. I honestly think she won't divorce him out of pure spite (or maybe she has her own man on the side). For me, the whole marriage is a sham but thats a story for another blog. Either way, in addition to having produced an outside child during the marriage, he has exactly THREE count 'em, THREE, long-term outside chicks that he has dealt with for YEARS. He spends 1 or 2 days a week with each one of these ladies, including overnight stays. He sees them all consistently enough for them to all be deluded into the idea that they are in a real relationship with him. I have personally met two of the women at social gatherings. He even goes to church pretty consistently (every other Sunday) with one of them ! Many times either one of these women is getting the short end of the time spent, but the most important detail is ,THEY ALL KNOW HE IS MARRIED BUT DO NOT KNOW THE OTHER GIRLFRIENDS EXIST. He has come close to getting busted on many occasions, not by the wife, but by one of the girlfriends & he works hard to keep them unaware of one another. Why ? Because somehow if any of them found out about the other, they might want to end the relationship. WTF? They are cool with the fact he has a wife, but another sideline......Oh Hell no ! LOL How ignorant.
This reminds me of a very unpleasant memory from my past. I am divorced. My ex-husband got caught up infidelity while we were living apart temporarily due to his job transfer. He was in LA & I was in Houston. By the time I figured it out, he was in a full fledged affair, with a women who was convinced that he was going to divorce me and be with her. She knew that he was married. I had just recently found out about her and my ex had expressed to me that he intended to end it with her so that he could try and work things out with me. I was devastated but did not want to divorce and was willing to try and mend the marriage and prayed that he would remove her from the equation to give us a chance. I wasn't very surprised when I got a call from her at 5:00AM one morning from California. She took this opportunity to enlighten me as to all that had gone on between herself and my husband. The most interesting thing about the conversation was what had actually prompted her call to me on this particular day. She admitted that he had tried to break things off with her & told her he wanted to work things out with his wife, she admitted that she was hurt angry & upset, she admitted that she was stalking him, because he was no longer giving her access to him, and on this particular evening that she was calling me, she had followed my husband from his apartment & confronted him with a woman that she had assumed was ME only to be told that it was NOT me ! A whole lot of drama ensued to the point that the police had to be called. It was a mess ! He later actually called me and confirmed this whole event, even admitting that he was on a "date" LOL ! to try and paint her as a "crazy stalker chick". Either way, I found it interesting that she felt the need to call me and tell me that my husband was cheating on us! Because for sure that was her goal, to be sure that I knew all that he was doing to both of us! I. HAVE.NO.WORDS.
As the saying goes, "How you get your man, is how you lose him".
Why don't women understand that, cheaters do what cheaters do.........cheat ?
I know a guy, who is a friend of a friend, he is married for many years, I am sure his wife knows he cheats, there is no way she could not, in my opinion. I honestly think she won't divorce him out of pure spite (or maybe she has her own man on the side). For me, the whole marriage is a sham but thats a story for another blog. Either way, in addition to having produced an outside child during the marriage, he has exactly THREE count 'em, THREE, long-term outside chicks that he has dealt with for YEARS. He spends 1 or 2 days a week with each one of these ladies, including overnight stays. He sees them all consistently enough for them to all be deluded into the idea that they are in a real relationship with him. I have personally met two of the women at social gatherings. He even goes to church pretty consistently (every other Sunday) with one of them ! Many times either one of these women is getting the short end of the time spent, but the most important detail is ,THEY ALL KNOW HE IS MARRIED BUT DO NOT KNOW THE OTHER GIRLFRIENDS EXIST. He has come close to getting busted on many occasions, not by the wife, but by one of the girlfriends & he works hard to keep them unaware of one another. Why ? Because somehow if any of them found out about the other, they might want to end the relationship. WTF? They are cool with the fact he has a wife, but another sideline......Oh Hell no ! LOL How ignorant.
This reminds me of a very unpleasant memory from my past. I am divorced. My ex-husband got caught up infidelity while we were living apart temporarily due to his job transfer. He was in LA & I was in Houston. By the time I figured it out, he was in a full fledged affair, with a women who was convinced that he was going to divorce me and be with her. She knew that he was married. I had just recently found out about her and my ex had expressed to me that he intended to end it with her so that he could try and work things out with me. I was devastated but did not want to divorce and was willing to try and mend the marriage and prayed that he would remove her from the equation to give us a chance. I wasn't very surprised when I got a call from her at 5:00AM one morning from California. She took this opportunity to enlighten me as to all that had gone on between herself and my husband. The most interesting thing about the conversation was what had actually prompted her call to me on this particular day. She admitted that he had tried to break things off with her & told her he wanted to work things out with his wife, she admitted that she was hurt angry & upset, she admitted that she was stalking him, because he was no longer giving her access to him, and on this particular evening that she was calling me, she had followed my husband from his apartment & confronted him with a woman that she had assumed was ME only to be told that it was NOT me ! A whole lot of drama ensued to the point that the police had to be called. It was a mess ! He later actually called me and confirmed this whole event, even admitting that he was on a "date" LOL ! to try and paint her as a "crazy stalker chick". Either way, I found it interesting that she felt the need to call me and tell me that my husband was cheating on us! Because for sure that was her goal, to be sure that I knew all that he was doing to both of us! I. HAVE.NO.WORDS.
As the saying goes, "How you get your man, is how you lose him".
Why don't women understand that, cheaters do what cheaters do.........cheat ?
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Breaking the Silence
Yesterday I mentioned a guy that I met about six weeks ago online. I met him on this site called P.lenty of F.ish that Tiffany in Houston told me about. I've been on the site for about 3 months & have met a couple of nice guys just no connection yet. So one day this guy contacts me first by email & the communication begins. We had two or three good phone conversations, got past the basic background info, 41, divorced for a little over a year, a couple of kids back in VA, retired military, no red flags at all. We decided to meet within a week. We met at a nice wine bar(of course) and had great conversation, he wasn't overly touchy or anything, but after a couple of hours of conversation and a couple of glasses of vino, I was feeling comfortable and so was he, and I was feeling a little cozy, but the conversation never really got into weird territory or anything. I thought I was feeling some chemistry & after 4 hours of talking, laughing & him planning our next date, I just knew I would see him again, and soon. He walked me to my car, we shared a nice kiss before departing & even chatted early the next morning to discuss finalizing the plans for our followup date. He was headed to his dads house to watch football & was supposed to call me around 6P. When he didn't call me I called him later that evening around 8P & left a voice mail. I called again the next day but hung up when his voice mail picked up. I was going to leave the ball in his court. I never heard from him again and I never initiated any more contact. That was six weeks ago.
Breaking the Silence
That was what he wrote in the subject line of the email I got yesterday. The rest read as follows :
Dear Beautifully Complex,
I know I'm wrong but hear me out, I did enjoy our night together but I don't think, you were looking for the same thing as me. I'm not looking to settle down right now, I am looking to play a little first. I am kinda heavy into the swingers life style right now and I did not read that from you at all. If I was wrong please let me know !!
Wow ! Just wow! Did I dodge a bullet or what ? I promptly replied :
I appreciate your explanation, because honestly, I was very confused by your disappearing act. But as I explained to you and showed you, I don't pursue men who don't seem interested in me. I know that my profile states that I am looking for "long term" and "children" so I am not sure why you had any indication that I was open to that type of lifestyle, or why you would have approached me from the beginning, but I appreciate you letting me know the deal just the same. I have been divorced for over 3 years and have pretty much played as much as I need to & am trying to be true to who I am as a woman. So, no you did not read me wrong at all ! We are definitely looking for totally different things. I wish you success in your search for your hearts desire.
Beautifully Complex
The truth really is stranger than fiction. I mean I could not make this stuff up ! Initially I told one of my friends that I figured that he must have lied about his status ( i. e, he was either married or separated) and figured out from our conversation on the date that it would not fly with me. Later, I just considered that he is single and dating & just encountered someone he was more interested in than me. But the idea that he is a swin.ger and looking to recruit me ! LOL You could have knocked me over with a feather.
I will never understand why people feel the need to fish in the wrong pond. I mean the internet is full of specialized websites to fit just about any niche that exists. This particular dating site has numerous parameters that you can set to determine whom you would like to date. The categories are almost endless. So why pursue someones profile who is completely opposite of what you are trying to do ? What happened to compatibility as a criteria ?Are men just that caught up in the challenge of changing your mind or trying to chop you down ? I am really curious as to what made him contact me after six weeks. I mean, I clearly moved on & he got absolutely no contact from me to indicate that I was even wondering what was up, I did a vanishing act myself after 2 unanswered calls which is customary for me when there is no reciprocity.
The last line killed me " If I was wrong please let me know " HA ! I guess this was his last ditch effort to pull me into this nonsense. Now that I am thinking about it, this fool probably contacted me again because he is not having any luck recruiting any other unsuspecting victims, so he's decided to use the direct approach, yeah just put it out there & see what she says ! LOL Oh well, at least I got a blog post out of it !
Have you ever met any real life swingers ? Ever been recruited or invited to participate ?
Breaking the Silence
That was what he wrote in the subject line of the email I got yesterday. The rest read as follows :
Dear Beautifully Complex,
I know I'm wrong but hear me out, I did enjoy our night together but I don't think, you were looking for the same thing as me. I'm not looking to settle down right now, I am looking to play a little first. I am kinda heavy into the swingers life style right now and I did not read that from you at all. If I was wrong please let me know !!
Wow ! Just wow! Did I dodge a bullet or what ? I promptly replied :
I appreciate your explanation, because honestly, I was very confused by your disappearing act. But as I explained to you and showed you, I don't pursue men who don't seem interested in me. I know that my profile states that I am looking for "long term" and "children" so I am not sure why you had any indication that I was open to that type of lifestyle, or why you would have approached me from the beginning, but I appreciate you letting me know the deal just the same. I have been divorced for over 3 years and have pretty much played as much as I need to & am trying to be true to who I am as a woman. So, no you did not read me wrong at all ! We are definitely looking for totally different things. I wish you success in your search for your hearts desire.
Beautifully Complex
The truth really is stranger than fiction. I mean I could not make this stuff up ! Initially I told one of my friends that I figured that he must have lied about his status ( i. e, he was either married or separated) and figured out from our conversation on the date that it would not fly with me. Later, I just considered that he is single and dating & just encountered someone he was more interested in than me. But the idea that he is a swin.ger and looking to recruit me ! LOL You could have knocked me over with a feather.
I will never understand why people feel the need to fish in the wrong pond. I mean the internet is full of specialized websites to fit just about any niche that exists. This particular dating site has numerous parameters that you can set to determine whom you would like to date. The categories are almost endless. So why pursue someones profile who is completely opposite of what you are trying to do ? What happened to compatibility as a criteria ?Are men just that caught up in the challenge of changing your mind or trying to chop you down ? I am really curious as to what made him contact me after six weeks. I mean, I clearly moved on & he got absolutely no contact from me to indicate that I was even wondering what was up, I did a vanishing act myself after 2 unanswered calls which is customary for me when there is no reciprocity.
The last line killed me " If I was wrong please let me know " HA ! I guess this was his last ditch effort to pull me into this nonsense. Now that I am thinking about it, this fool probably contacted me again because he is not having any luck recruiting any other unsuspecting victims, so he's decided to use the direct approach, yeah just put it out there & see what she says ! LOL Oh well, at least I got a blog post out of it !
Have you ever met any real life swingers ? Ever been recruited or invited to participate ?
Just Me...Randomly
Greetings Blog family ! I know I have been MIA but sometimes when so much is coming your way, you have to unplug from certain aspects of life just a little bit and refocus. I think it is very beneficial and necessary.
My closest friend lost her mother just two weeks ago, this has been a very challenging time. I have been as supportive as possible but still feel so helpless. How do you comfort someone when they lose their mother, when she was the truest essence of that word ?
Speaking of mothers, I saw the movie "Precious" and was reminded of how much in this life so many people take for granted. All of what we have is through his Grace and Mercy. No question, we also have the power to change some things in our lives, but where you have to start from is not in our hands.
One of my high school classmates father passed away yesterday. He had a massive heart attack while jogging. He was one of my favorite teachers and a much loved coach at our school. I feel so numb.
My mother's doctor found some spots on her liver a few weeks ago, after many tests, lots of worry, fear and of course prayers, she has been given positive news. Thank you Lord.
It is really hard to realize that I am moving into the phase of life where my friends begin to lose their parents & mortality in general is in your face. Its the cycle of life, but still shakes me to think of it.
On to a lighter note, I will be home for an extended time for Thanksgiving and looking forward to spending time with my nieces, nephew and the rest of the family, counting my blessings with not enough fingers and toes to do so.
I was able to recruit even more family members to participate in the Turkey Trot again this year. I am trying my best to promote health and fitness & they are fighting me but still coming along although its begrudgingly :)
I met a guy about 6 weeks ago, we had a few really good conversations, a seemingly great first date (it lasted 4 hours), with a promise of another date in short order.........and then he vanished into thin air. No response to my calls or texts. I was puzzled for many days, then let it go. Yesterday he sent me an email with his explanation....it was interesting. I will blog about it tomorrow.
I have a good friend, whose step-son is gay. He just turned 17. She has known him since he was four years old when she started dating his dad & has been his stepmother for about 10 years. They have a very close relationship. It was obvious to me by the time he was nine or ten. I watch how he interacts with both of them & he is more comfortable around her and less so around his dad. He puts on a different persona when he is around his dad, but its still obvious to me. She says she has known since he was probably six, but it was confirmed for her when she saw some pictures on his m.ys.pace page a couple of years ago. His father is in total denial. He forced him to delete his profile, but still won't acknowledge the obvious. He is a "man's man". He thinks he can change his son by changing his behavior & will never accept it. My friend is in the middle. I feel sorry for each one of them. I wish I could help, but this is such a sensitive matter.
Comments ? Suggestions ? Whats going on random with you ?
My closest friend lost her mother just two weeks ago, this has been a very challenging time. I have been as supportive as possible but still feel so helpless. How do you comfort someone when they lose their mother, when she was the truest essence of that word ?
Speaking of mothers, I saw the movie "Precious" and was reminded of how much in this life so many people take for granted. All of what we have is through his Grace and Mercy. No question, we also have the power to change some things in our lives, but where you have to start from is not in our hands.
One of my high school classmates father passed away yesterday. He had a massive heart attack while jogging. He was one of my favorite teachers and a much loved coach at our school. I feel so numb.
My mother's doctor found some spots on her liver a few weeks ago, after many tests, lots of worry, fear and of course prayers, she has been given positive news. Thank you Lord.
It is really hard to realize that I am moving into the phase of life where my friends begin to lose their parents & mortality in general is in your face. Its the cycle of life, but still shakes me to think of it.
On to a lighter note, I will be home for an extended time for Thanksgiving and looking forward to spending time with my nieces, nephew and the rest of the family, counting my blessings with not enough fingers and toes to do so.
I was able to recruit even more family members to participate in the Turkey Trot again this year. I am trying my best to promote health and fitness & they are fighting me but still coming along although its begrudgingly :)
I met a guy about 6 weeks ago, we had a few really good conversations, a seemingly great first date (it lasted 4 hours), with a promise of another date in short order.........and then he vanished into thin air. No response to my calls or texts. I was puzzled for many days, then let it go. Yesterday he sent me an email with his explanation....it was interesting. I will blog about it tomorrow.
I have a good friend, whose step-son is gay. He just turned 17. She has known him since he was four years old when she started dating his dad & has been his stepmother for about 10 years. They have a very close relationship. It was obvious to me by the time he was nine or ten. I watch how he interacts with both of them & he is more comfortable around her and less so around his dad. He puts on a different persona when he is around his dad, but its still obvious to me. She says she has known since he was probably six, but it was confirmed for her when she saw some pictures on his m.ys.pace page a couple of years ago. His father is in total denial. He forced him to delete his profile, but still won't acknowledge the obvious. He is a "man's man". He thinks he can change his son by changing his behavior & will never accept it. My friend is in the middle. I feel sorry for each one of them. I wish I could help, but this is such a sensitive matter.
Comments ? Suggestions ? Whats going on random with you ?
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